Tag Archives: humorous poetry

The First Day Of School

Holy crap yes, that day is finally here,

The brand new start to a whole new school year.

Lessons and meetings plus excuses galore,

Mind numbing students who stare at the floor.

You’ll do what we want, you’ll do what we say,

Put them in groups or pairs every day.

Higher level questioning on things they don’t get,

Forget those state tests, you don’t have to fret.

So enjoy these last moments, and then just jump in the fray,

Watch the stupidity but stay out of the way.

It’s no doubt you will live, It’s no doubt you will thrive,

Just keep your sanity and stay fully alive.

So as you sit there tomorrow, eyes covered in glaze,

Remember that summer is in 187 short days.

 

The Zoo

I live in a house that seems like a zoo,

A rabbit, a cat and a dog form the crew.

They all get along, it’s a strange sight to see,

The bunny and cat, they frolic with glee!

So, the two of them together, they find themselves frisky,

Should we let the dog play? Or is it just to damn risky?

We love you my friend, but you’re really to large,

To let you come play, being as big as a barge.

So that leaves him alone, our ninety pound Jase,

To join in the fun, to be part of the chase.

But when it’s all over and the day it is done,

They all love each other and all live as one!

It’s Summertime!

sad-dog_l

Teachers the night before the first day of school

The summer’s half gone as teachers lament,

The month of July was time very well spent.

Sitting around on a nice sandy beach,

Nirvana and bliss are well within reach.

But the days slowly pass and with ease they go by,

This shouldn’t end, they say with a sigh.

But time marches on, and September draws near,

The summer is ending, that much is clear.

So enjoy the long days and put out of your head,

The inevitable truth and that strange sense of dread.

Because that day it will come and soon we’ll return,

To lessons and meetings, and all that we yearn.

But even as nice as the summers may be,

It’s the kids we await because they hold the key!

 

 

Here I Sit

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Sitting and sitting is all that I do.

From the time I get up till quarter to two.

As I listen to music and read books on the past,

All I can think is “I gotta get out of this cast!

So my doctors they tell me that after 35 long days,

That my cast and I may finally part ways.

I hope that he’s right and what he says will come true,

Because if it doesn’t, I’ll really be blue.

But you my dear reader, do you really care?

Have you given a thought to my need of fresh air?

So now I’ll stop writing and continue to sit,

And you’ll stay where you are and not give a…

And The Winner Is…The Rocks!

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There once was a guy named Mike,

And boy did he like to hike.

Into the woods and onto the trail,

Walking and walking so he could tell a good tale.

Then came that morning, on a hot day in June,

When he strapped on the pack and it ended too soon.

The rain had come heavily, the whole night before,

It seemed that the rocks had to settle a score.

As he walked on those rocks, and he breathed in the air,

The hiking was good, and he had not a care.

Then all at once, he started to slide,

With nowhere to run and nowhere to hide.

His foot then then got caught and he heard a strange snap,

Oh what had happened? Was it some kind of trap?

As he lay on the ground, the situation was grim,

He knew it was bad, his head started to swim.

One short week later, after the surgery was done,

It was obvious and true that the rocks, they had won.

Happy Hiking!!!

 

 

 

To Rhyme Or Not To Rhyme…

People have asked why do your poems rhyme?

I search for an answer, one that takes time.

So I think and I think but I can’t offer a clue,

Why do my poems rhyme? Oh what should I do?

There must be a reason why I like words to have cadence, a smooth mellow flow,

I think that they focus me and help me create each tale of woe!

 

Thwart

They said that spring was in the air and I believed that to be true.

But the days they pass and nothing changes, I’m ready for something new.

Winters chill is hanging on, refusing to let go.

So every day I open the door and hope there is no more snow.

But springs arrival keeps being thwarted, this we know is fact,

To expect some warmer days and greener grass we have to make a pact.

Let’s agree here and now, by decree or proclamation,

That spring has sprung and is here to stay and to all else fire and hell damnation. 

Thwart

Frigid (2)

The skies are frigid, a cool cobalt blue,

Winter won’t leave, we know that much is true.

As I lay in my bed with my eyes closed so tight,

I think of a warm spring all through the long night.

But then I wake up and look out the door,

I sincerely believe winter will be many weeks more.

 

Frigid

Time Passes, Will You?

Kids watching clocks, hoping they’ll move.

The lesson progresses, they’re still in the groove.

As time marches on, young eyes they become glazed,

Nothing can move them in their permanent haze.

They still think they’ll pass, without having a clue,

What should they remember? Time passes, will you?

 

 

A Two Hour Delay!

They say that teachers wait all year for the summer,

Because the cold days of January are always a bummer.

And since I’m a teacher where the snow always falls,

I anxiously await that magical call.

But to get that call, the timing must be just right,

The snow needs to falling well into the night.

So when it is snowing, I sit by the phone,

Hoping and hoping that I’m not alone.

When the call finally comes and much to my dismay,

It’s not a day off, but a two hour delay!